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Kindness and Harmony

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Author Topic: Kindness and Harmony  (Read 480 times)

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« on: October 13, 2012, 12:22:16 pm »

I've been with this guild for about a year now. I've worked to become an officer and I worked harder when I became one.

This guild is a social guild. We have all come here because we love FiM. This guild was built on what the show stands for: Honesty, Loyalty, Generosity, Kindness, Laughter, and most importantly: Friendship.

When I became an officer I saw some things in the guild I didn't like. New members were trickling in. They'd stay for a while but if they didn't work to be involved or get lucky the doors were shut. Most would just stop playing. Loyalty was our cliquish A team and Laughter was the B team. But to keep Laughter alive many Loyalty members took spots in it. Either Laughter didn't raid because there wasn't enough people or Loyalty could double dip. Eventually Laughter fell apart.

Not all of our members got along. We can't expect that everyone will, and when the issues were addressed nothing really happened. There were no consequences and there was no growth and development.

The guild grew stagnant. Partly because of the mentioned issues and partly because of pre-expansion blues. I told myself "a month before the expansion I'm going to fix this". That time has come and I am still in the middle of making changes.

The first thing I did was recruitment. The guild went from maybe having 5-6 at peak time to having around 25. This is fantastic. We've exploded and I want to thank everyone for willing to be a part of this.

Recruitment was the easy part. It's easy to point a big flashing light at yourself and draw people in. But they want something out of it.

Before I get into that though I want to talk about my role as an officer in the guild. The core reason we play WoW is to have fun. Every action we take in the game is more or less aimed at the goal to have fun. As an officer it is my goal to make sure people have fun. Setting up raids, driving recruitment so there are people to meet the number requirements and to have fun with, and settling drama when it arises. But this is a social guild. As an officer I have one more job: To facilitate the making and maintaining of friendships.

When I became an officer I saw two options. Keep things the way they were. Hold on to the tried and true. Keep Loyalty together, allow recruitment to continue to trickle, and stick any new people in the new B team, if it ever rose up. Or I could mix things up, split up the raids, recruit new people and incorporate them into the guild. The first option was the safe route. Low risk, low reward. The second, high risk, high reward. Not everyone is going to mesh perfectly.

I would rather say that I tried and failed to make this guild shine than to settle for the old, familiar guild with a slimy underside that we hid. I would rather be disliked for trying my hardest to help people see the value of Forgiveness, New Friends, Stronger Relationships, Grace, Kindness, and Maturation than to be liked because I kicked out so and so who is annoying.

So, as I said, Loyalty was a clique. There were the vets who hung out pretty much exclusively with each other and there was everyone else. Sometimes someone cool would join the guild and pop by every so often, but they never joined the core group. That space was filled. As a social guild this is terrible. No one is making meaningful friendships with the newer members. Raiding was the culprit and so I've adressed it in the raids.

The two groups aren't just designed to have efficient comps. Both groups are a mix of vets and new people. Along with that I kept couples together. Caedea and Lupi, I made these group with you two in mind. "Now wait a minute Pokey, Adam and Kelda aren't together". You're right and I'll get to that. I want to facilitate making new friends in this guild and to do that I mixed you guys up. I had 21 sign-ups and I filled in 20 spots. I really hope the group do well because I tried my hardest to make them capable of succeeding.

Now for Adam and Kelda. They joined the guild a little after I did if I recall correctly. They also joined with Anonpony. I like Anonpony. He's a nice kid. But he had social problems he could not get over. These weren't all his fault and for his privacy I won't get into the details. After at least 7 months of trying to work with him we asked him to leave. That was a terrible blow to me. Because it felt like I failed. I understand that it's not my fault, and I worked to avoid his leaving.

Anon was a catalyst for drama. Again, not his fault. His presence would drive up stress. If you couldn't deal with it you would explode sooner or later. Not everyone deals with stress easily and Adam and Kelda are two such people. Once Anon got them going they would start to feed off each others stress and sometimes it wasn't pretty.

All three of them left. Adam and Kelda didn't leave with the best of graces. I wasn't there but as I understand it there was quite a blowout. I talked to Kelda afterwards. I don't remember exactly what I said but it basically ended with me telling her that I don't want to lose a friend to something that seemed so overblown. I asked most of the officers if they would be fine with me bringing them back and they by and large agreed.

Their self-imposed exile might have allowed them to reflect but not everyone saw it or quite understands what drove me to take such a risk. Talking to some people I've come to understand that they think that because Adam and Kelda drove themselves out of the guild  they shouldn't have a second chance. They screwed up and they should pay the price.

But I say **** that. That is not what this guild is about. This guild is about Friendship and the magic power it has. I'm not about to abandon two of my friends because they screwed up. I see that the situation has changed. They know that they screwed up and Anon is no longer here. I'm not repeating the same mistake because things have changed. This time I want things to work out. This time I want to see them grow and mature and learn. And I want the rest of the guild to as well.

This will not be an easy thing. Friendships will have to be mended. Forgiveness will have to take place. It's not up to me to do that. It's up to Adam and Kelda to reach out and ask for Forgiveness. It's up to the rest of you to decide it you will Forgive them. And I really hope you do.

They have been separated because I feel they need to do this as individuals. And if they do this, if you help them to do this. I think there will be so much more to cherish than if we abandoned them.

This is a risk. It might not work. They might not be able to overcome this. You might decide not to forgive them. It's not up to me. I've given them the chance and I give you the responsibility of accepting them or not.

There is a price to pay for this. It's already taken it's toll on me and it's taken it's toll on them. I lost a friend because I choose to believe in Adam and Kelda. Ash told me that either they left or he left. I really wish Ash the best of luck because I would rather take such a great risk for such a great reward. The reward of Friendship. The reward of Growth and Maturity and of Harmony. There is so much more we could gain, as a guild, by finding Harmony than creating it by kicking out those we don't like.

For this reason I would like to name the new raid groups.

I would like to name Group 1 Harmony. We are looking for Harmony and when we find it great things will be gained that day. I hope Kelda and Adam find Harmony with the rest of the guild.

I would like to name Group 2 Kindness. For it will be your Kindness that allows Harmony to be found. Your Kindness will do great things. I hope you will find, from the Kindness in your hearts, the ability to forgive. And from that, help grow this guild.
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Pokeypierce the rogue

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« Reply #1 on: October 21, 2012, 05:07:59 pm »

I need to set a couple things straight. I joined with after Anon. I had only recently bought Wow, and he invited me to the guild because we shared common interest. I hadn't met Adam until March. Okay, now to the things that are making me angry. 1. Anon did not 'Get me started' on anything. The way this guild was being run at the time got me started. 2. Me and Adam didn't 'feed off each others stress' We were a newly formed couple at the time of our ONLY blow up. Wanna know what happened then? We were raiding Dragon Soul, on the ship. And Our old GM Filly decided it would be funny to mess with Adams ranks. Over and over again, he was demoted, promoted, demoted again. When asked to stop Filly wouldn't. THIS led Adam to /gquit. Now THIS is where I got involved. I'm not sure if many people here know how a couple works but, this is nothing wrong. This was our 'feeding' to people. I started getting very angry and griping. and before I knew it, everyone was against me! So i quit too. This 'drama' led to the raid to be stopped at 6/8 bosses. THIS is the drama that keeps being brought up. AGAIN. AND. AGAIN. THIS? Is not feeding off each other. THIS is not getting into each others buisness. this is an issue, that wasn't being solved. What else is there to do when your GM is the one doing it? NO ONE. THIS is what keeps getting used when I ask. "Why can't me and Adam be in the same raid group?" My reply? "Because you feed off each other and cause drama. I don't want people to know you as Kelda & Adam. I want people to know you as Kelda. and him as Adam" I can agree to a point. Not completely. I can admit. Me and Adam stick up for each other ALOT. But you wanna know why? I'm given a bad reputation because i like to speak my mind. I tell people how it is alot and i don't sugar coat it. People get ****ed at me, and then the judging begins along with the distancing. Adam sticks up for me because with the exception of a few? No one else will.  THIS is not feeding. This is sticking with the person who means the most. Yeah we could tone it down a bit. And we've been working on it. It's fixed. NOW that i have that all sorted. One more thing before i get to the big part. I hope one day.. we can find it in our hearts. To welcome back Anon with open arms. There are many things about him you don't know. And all of these things make him who he is. All i can say is that i hope that with Love and Tolerating, he can come back. I know many of you don't like him.. based on what you read but.. just. If you get to know him someday. You'll see.

All that being said.
I would like to say thank you. SO SO SO Much to the people who've worked so hard. To help me and Adam to get back into the guild. This guild is like my family. It's full of people I love to hate, love to love, and well. Just plain want to ****. I never meant to hurt anyone by leaving. But at the time, it was for the best. Anon was like my brother, and seeing him treated like that hurt me. People will say that they don't know how much i hurt people by leaving but, Does anyone really know how much it killed me to leave? That doesn't matter though. I'm so happy that I've been, seemingly welcomed back. The people who are trying so hard to put up with me, the people who don't know me and are trying to get to know me, the people i made a bad impression on. All of you are trying to help us. And this is more than I can ever ask for. I can only say that I'll try my very best for not only myself but for the guild. And for my relationships with every single one of you. You are all so important to me, whether you like me or not. This guild, you people mean the world and more. I truely appreciate everything that is being done for us. And I can never thank you enough. This is like a fresh start for me and I want to make it the best I can.

My name is Kelda, I've been a brony for about a year now. I like writing stories, singing in mumble, and a weird sense of humor. I'm hard-headed and I'm hard to love sometimes. Nice to meet you all and I hope to become good friends with all of you.
« Last Edit: October 21, 2012, 05:11:23 pm by Kelda » Report Spam   Logged

I'll herp your derp. ^.~
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